Dad jokes Twitter is the perfect place to find the funniest, corniest, and most groan-worthy jokes that dads love to share.
If you’re looking for a daily dose of laughter that’s simple, clever, and guaranteed to make you smile, then you’ve come to the right spot.
Twitter is packed with hilarious dad jokes from real users who keep the tradition alive by posting fresh and relatable humor every day.
Whether you want to impress your friends, lighten up your day, or just enjoy some classic pun-filled fun, these dad jokes will never disappoint.
Dad Jokes Twitter One Liners
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts 💀😂
- I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down! 📚😆
- Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere 🌕🍽️
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field 🌾🏆
- I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands 🎹😜
- Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it 🏗️🤪
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up 🥚🤣
- I would tell you a joke about pizza, but it’s a little cheesy 🍕😄
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta 🍝😝
- I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it 🦀😋
- Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will let it go 🎈❄️
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised 😲🎨
- How do you organize a space party? You planet 🪐🎉
- What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory 🏭😉
- Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems ➗😢
- I used to be a banker but I lost interest 💰😅
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing 🍅😳
- I made a belt out of watches. It was a waist of time ⌚🤣
- Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs 🐝🍯
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
Best Dad Jokes Twitter
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick 🌳😄
- I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered 📅😬
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it 💧🔥
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged ☕🚓
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired 🚲😴
- What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time ⌚😂
- Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one ⛳👖
- What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room? The living room 🏠💀
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together 🐧🏠
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything ⚛️😆
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus 💻🤒
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman ⛄💪
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta 🍝😄
- Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy 🍪🏥
- What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A kingfish 👑🐟
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out 🏋️♂️❤️
- Why was the math book sad? Too many problems ➗😭
- Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot 👃👣
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite ⛄🐶
Funny Dad Jokes Twitter
- I told my computer I needed a break. It said “No problem, I’ll go to sleep” 💻😴
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear 🐻😁
- I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down! 📚😄
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing 🍅😳
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator 🐊🕵️♂️
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together 🐧🏠
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta 🍝🤣
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up 🥚😂
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain 🐱⛰️
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field 🌾🏆
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it 💧🔥
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick 🌳😆
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired 🚲😴
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman ⛄💪
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything ⚛️😅
- Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems ➗😭
- What do you call a fish that wears a crown? A kingfish 👑🐟
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out 🏋️♀️❤️
Dirty Dad Jokes Twitter (Light and Playful)
- Why did the broom get a promotion? It was sweeping the floor with the competition 🧹😉
- What do you call a dirty joke that’s clean? A dad joke 🧔😄
- Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish 🦪😆
- What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe 👡😜
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well 🍌🤒
- What’s a plumber’s favorite vegetable? Leek 🛠️🥬
- Why do potatoes make good detectives? Because they keep their eyes peeled 🥔🕵️♂️
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut 🌰🐿️
- What do you call a snobbish criminal going downstairs? A condescending con descending ⬇️😆
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing 🍅😳
- What did one toilet say to the other? You look flushed 🚽😳
- What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? Put it on my bill 💄🦆
- Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs 🐝🍯
- How do you organize a space party? You planet 🪐🎉
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out ❤️🏋️♂️
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta 🍝🤣
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field 🌾🏆
- I made a belt out of watches. It was a waist of time ⌚🤣
Trending Dad Jokes on Twitter 2025
- Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they’d be bagels 🥯🕊️
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus 🦖📚
- Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks 🥁🐔
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone 🎺💀
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut 🌰🐿️
- Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus 💻🤒
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh 🐟😆
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything ⚛️🤣
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired 🚲😴
- What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner 🧱😄
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems ➗😢
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up 🥚😂
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick 🌳🤣
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta 🍝😝
- Why was the calendar afraid? Its days were numbered 📅😬
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman ⛄💪
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing 🍅😳
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear 🐻😁
Classic Dad Jokes You’ll Love on Twitter
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything ⚛️🤣
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together 🐧🏠
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick 🌳😄
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field 🌾🏆
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh 🐟😆
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out ❤️🏋️♂️
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it 💧🔥
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
- Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy 🍪🏥
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up 🥚😂
- What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner 🧱😄
- What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room? The living room 🏠💀
- I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it 🦀😋
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired 🚲😴
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain 🐱⛰️
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta 🍝😄
- Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems ➗😭
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman ⛄💪
- Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot 👃👣
Twitter Dad Jokes for Kids and Family
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up 🥚😂
- What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus 🦖📚
- Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had the drumsticks 🥁🐔
- What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone 🎺💀
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything ⚛️🤣
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese 🧀😜
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick 🌳😄
- How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it 💧🔥
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing 🍅😳
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta 🍝🤣
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear 🐻😁
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out ❤️🏋️♂️
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together 🐧🏠
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot 🥕🦜
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field 🌾🏆
- Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems ➗😭
- What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman ⛄💪
- What did one toilet say to the other? You look flushed 🚽😳
- Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy 🍪🏥
- What’s a plumber’s favorite vegetable? Leek 🛠️🥬
FAQs:
What are dad jokes?
Dad jokes are simple, pun-filled jokes often known for their cheesy humor.
Why are dad jokes popular on Twitter?
Their short, witty nature fits perfectly with Twitter’s character limit and quick-read style.
Can dad jokes be found under specific hashtags on Twitter?
Yes, hashtags like #DadJokes and #Pun are commonly used to share these jokes.
Are dad jokes suitable for all ages on Twitter?
Generally, yes—dad jokes are family-friendly and widely enjoyed.
How often do Twitter users post dad jokes?
Many accounts tweet dad jokes daily or multiple times a day.
Can I share my own dad jokes on Twitter?
Absolutely, Twitter is a great platform to share your humor with others.
Do famous comedians use dad jokes on Twitter?
Some comedians and influencers do use dad jokes to engage their followers.
Are dad jokes on Twitter mostly text or do they include images?
Both—dad jokes appear as text tweets, memes, or images with captions.
Can dad jokes on Twitter go viral?
Yes, simple and relatable dad jokes often get retweeted and liked widely.
Where can I find the best dad joke Twitter accounts?
Popular accounts include @DadJokes, @TheDadJoke, and other humor pages dedicated to puns.
Conclusion
If you were searching for the best dad jokes Twitter has to offer, your quest ends here! From quick one-liners to funny, classic, trending, and even slightly cheeky puns, this article has it all.
These jokes are simple enough for kids to understand and funny enough for grown-ups to enjoy, making them perfect for sharing with family and friends.
